Another diagnosis and specialist

Today I did something that felt very odd. I toted Noah off to my office to have him evaluated by an audiologist.  Filling out the paperwork as a parent and sitting in the waiting room was weird. And honestly, I didn't like it. Don't know why, but it just felt wrong.  You may remember that at the appointment we had with an allergist the day Noah was diagnosed, he raised some concern about his speech and hearing. He insisted that I "should KNOW how delayed his speech is (because I'm a pediatric PT, apparently) and that his hearing should definitely be checked. I wasn't happy overall with this doctor, so it was easy for me to blow off his comments about how delayed his speech is but I did actually agree that we should have his hearing checked because he's had so many ear infections. Yes, I know, I have a tendency to filter stuff out, blow things off all together or simply not hear what I don't want to hear sometimes, especially when it comes to my child.  Not good, but sometimes it's my defense mechanism. Anyway, we were able to get an appointment very quickly (no, not because I pulled any strings, but just because I so happened to be standing next to the scheduler when the cancellation list popped up).

The end result of the appointment was another good news/not so great news scenario: very good news is that Noah does NOT have any permanent hearing loss from all the infections. Not so great news is that he should have a 20 word vocabulary and be putting 2 words together on a regular basis. (Which, incidentally is VERY different than the check list my pediatrician had and hence the cause of his chagrin to refer us for the test). He has 5 words and rarely strings two together. The only actual phrase he has is "hi papa"! The audiologist had one of the speechies come in and give me some suggestions of things to start working on with him but she also strongly recommended that we have him evaluated thoroughly ASAP. Right now, he does not have any fluid in his ears, so he's hearing perfectly and thus we should be working with him on making sounds now.  Apparently when you have chronic ear infections,  you go through periods of time where everything sounds like you have your fingers in your ears or are underwater. Which is why Noah's speech has not developed properly. He makes all kinds of noises with different intonations but doesn't actually form many words.  It was very comforting to know that his delay is isolated to only his expressive speech. His receptive speech and ability to communicate his needs and wants are excellent. He's a sharp boy....he just hasn't figured out how to say many words yet.

For some reason, I'm having a hard time dealing with the fact that there is now another thing "wrong" with my baby boy. We are now up to 5 specialists dealing with 5 different diagnoses. While only one of them is potentially life-threatening, it's discouraging to have such a long list at such a tender, young age. I know that I shouldn't complain about having to put so much effort into parenting (that's my JOB and my JOY) but some days are harder than others. It certainly doesn't help that Noah has had a very rough week again and we are going on four nights of little sleep as we deal with his tummy pain again. Tired Julie is never the most optimistic or equipped to cope with more bad news. That's probably true of us all, though, I would imagine!

So, there are my ramblings for the day. Once again, I am deeply grateful for a Heavenly Father who loves me and my children more than I will ever know and who has already put all the pieces of this puzzle together for me!