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Friday, August 12, 2011

A broken dream

This is a post I've been putting off writing for several days now. I simply don't have the emotional fortitude to go into detail right now, but our adoption process has come come to a stop. On Wednesday, I was told the girls were going to be moving out of their current foster home and into another temporary home. There are several reasons why this can't be our home. After processing that change of events, we had to back ourselves up away from the picture and take a seriously hard look at ALL the pieces of the puzzle. And that is what brought us to a stop. Please pray for us as we prayerfully consider where to go from here and what the plan for these beautiful girls is. I know that's all very vague but it hurts to much to think about, let alone put in words what is going on. I did want to share this latest turn of events, though, because so many of you have been supporting us in amazing ways and we need your love, support and prayers now more than ever.

After having a little get-together for Noah's birthday on Sunday, John and I are "going off the grid" so we can enjoy our much anticipated 3 night vacation. Please pray that it will be the time of relaxation and fun that we really want (and I think I can say NEED) and that we would be able to continue processing where to go from here with the girls.

We are so very grateful for the love and support of our family and friends!

2 comments:

  1. Oh Julie I'm so sorry about the difficulties with the adoption. We will remember your family in our prayers for sure. Please try and relax and have fun! 10 years is a milestone. **HUGS** Dawn

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  2. Wish I could give you a big HUG right now. :( Coincidentally, another friend of mine also wrote about her adoption process experience today ... thought you might appreciate her words today:

    One of the moms we traveled to Ethiopia with told me a story of how God spoke to her through her 3 year old daughter and said, "I hear you. I see you." I felt like that word was for me also. It was very comforting. I had some quiet time with Him last week after the very bad day I had of putting away the smaller baby clothes and hanging up the 12 month clothes, not being sure she would even fit into these by the time she got home. During this quiet time I just sat and tried to listen. I just tried to focus on His presence. It was good to just be like that. That afternoon I had inexplicable peace.

    Later in the day I realized He was telling my heart to bury the plans that I had been forming and to be open to the plans He had for us. His plans were better and there were reasons. It wasn't just chance or because He didn't have time to get to us. There were reasons. I also felt like He was telling me to get ready for Him to reveal Himself in an exciting way.

    The peace was still with me the next day and then I was overwhelmed with gratitude for the opportunity to make B ours and to raise her in our home. I realized that I needed to spend my time thanking God and not pushing my plan on Him. So, I have been focused on this ever since, just waiting on His next move.

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